He has made all things beautiful in His time." - Ecclesiastes 3:11

His world crumbled when he had to give up the condo by the bay. After all, it was his dream to have one overlooking Manila Bay. A substantial chunk of his hard earned money went to the amortization of the property. Therefore, when he couldn't afford anymore to pay the monthly amortization due to some unexpected family obligations, it was as if his dream was crushed before his very eyes.

He had to asked God why does it have to happen. "Did i do you any wrong? What have i done to deserve this?" he lamented. But his questions seemed to have fallen on deaf ears. No answer... or so he thought.

It was very painful. The flat, for him, was perfect. (He dreamed of having a condo with a balcony and an ocean view. He got it. Not really a full view of the ocean but at least he can see it still since having a full front view will be very expensive. He settled for a unit in the 8th floor. That's all he can afford. Not bad. In fung shui, 8 is a good number.) 

He had to make a personal appeal to the president of the  real estate company just to salvage some of the money he invested. The president was gracious enough. As a compromise, he will transfer to a new condo project of the company somewhere in Makati;  the expenses from the bay condo incurred by the company- i.e. taxes paid, registration, agent's commission, etc.-- will have to be deducted from the amount he has already paid. Still a huge amount but better than nothing. So with a heavy hard, he agreed.

His agent gave him a good location- a 1BR loft on the 32nd floor and a corner unit. It also has a balcony and the Manila Bay is still very visible. He will have a full front view of the sea. Ok na rin. He may have to wait a while since expected turn over is still in late 2009 or early 2010.

And so, for almost a year now, he has been paying the Makati unit diligently. But whenever he sees his previous unit now standing tall in the bay area, the hurt returns. Forever, it will remind him of a major disaster in his life. The Manila Bay condo is very visible from the 27F of the building where his office station is.

In late May, his real estate agent called.

Agent: Hey, ahmm, there's a problem with regards to your flat. The developer will have to convert all the units in the 32nd floor into a 1BR flat. No longer a loft.

Guy: Huh? how can that be? I want a loft. That's what the contract said.

Agent: Yea, i know. Will try to do something,

Guy: Ok. But please let's make it clear to the developer, much as i appreciated the kindness of the president, I want the loft. That's what the contract that i signed said. If they can't give it, i will have to withdraw all the investment i have and look for another unit. I cant bear another disappointment.

Fast forward. Mid-June:

Agent: I have great news for you!

Guy: Really? tell me about it :)

Agent:  You will have your loft. And since the loft will only be available at the Penthouse, there you will be! This will be at no extra charge. You'll have the same payment terms... and what's more, since there will be just several units in the 37th, all loft owners will have a private viewing deck and a garden.

He was speechless.

He then realized, GOD gave all the wishes of his heart... and more. He dreamed of a full Manila bay view- check. A balcony- check. Bonus: the location is very near his workplace, it's a loft with a garden, and more importantly, in two years time, he will live at the penthouse.

Finally, his question was answered and he can see clearly now. He must have done somothing good to deserve all these :-)

Image provided by http://www.flickr.com/photos/traces/895338560/

Several featured employees told me they had a hard time answering most of the questions. I decided to try it myself. Totoo nga... I thought it was that simple. The questions made me think. More than thinking, it put me in a reflective mode.

Here it goes:

Before PMPMI, I used to work at … Hemisphere Leo Burnett for three years as a senior PR Manager. Prior to that, I was in Malacanang for 10 years starting as a junior presidential writer to head of the Malacanang Press Office’s Substantive Group when I left in 2001.

In PMPMI, my job is to…mainly oversee the internal communications functions of the Corporate Affairs department. I am also into External comm-- doing media relations and writing speeches, organizing events, etc.

Working in PMPMI is…very challenging. One is always in the fast lane. The issues never end!  

The thing I love most about the job is…I still get to do what I love most—writing. There are also perks that go with my post J

In 10 years time, I see myself …hmmm... I’ll be 48 by then… so it’s like I am counting the days towards retirement. I said I want to retire at 50 to pursue other things that have to be set aside for now due to some obligations.

People might be surprised to know that I…still long for a quiet and contemplative life, away from the crowd. Entering a monastery is still a very strong option for me. And until now, I still wonder why I am into public relations, meaning always meeting with people, socializing, partying.

The most important lesson in life that I learned is …goodness does not beget goodness all the time. Me mga assholes talaga na kahit gawan mo nang mabuti, sasaksakin ka pa din sa likod.

The best thing that ever happened to me was…when I became the close-in writer of President Fidel Ramos. I got to travel the world, shook hands with world leaders, lived in palaces—all for FREE J

The biggest risk that I ever took was …leaving Malacanang, my playground for 10 years; and accepting a job offer from Leo Burnett to be a PR consultant for PMPMI.

And what this taught me was…big risk means big return. 

The secret to happiness is…living simply. I am now simplifying my life, discarding unnecessary luggages. I want to travel light.

The formula to success is… prayers, lots of it… and of course, hard work and excellence in what ever you do.

The soundtrack of my life would include…right now, it’s Diana Ross’/Mariah Carey’s “Do You Know Where You’re Going To.”

The thing that I cannot tolerate is…mediocrity.

If I were the most powerful person on earth…I will eradicate poverty and everybody will live in comfort. I will also instill compassion in the heart of every human being so there will be no injustice. Only love.

If money is not an option, I … will resign from work right away, pack my things and explore the world. Of course, while globetrotting, there will be someone in-charge of giving money to all the poor families so they can start their own business hehe.

The best thing about family is that…I know I will always have a home.

When I’m gone, they would probably say…honestly, I really don’t know. I just hope that it will be something positive. I believe I am trying my very best to be a good person.

My hero is…a lot actually. At different points in my life, there were always someone who came along to save and help me. More than heroes, they were angels.

The thing that makes my life worth living is…knowing that you are existing because you have a mission—and that is to be God’s instrument for the fulfillment of HIS will.

My greatest hope for the future is… that I will be able to fulfill all the goals that I have set so that when the time is up, I will not have any regrets and will slip away peacefully.

My favorite moments are when…I’m exercising, especially the cool down part that includes meditation. That’s when I am most at peace—body and soul.

My best ever outfit consisted of… t-shirt,  ¾ shorts and rubber shoes. I go for comfort. I am not really a fashionista.

I’m saving up for…a condo. Actually, I am not saving for it. I am paying for it since 2005.

My biggest indulgence is… my weekly spa sessions. It used to be designer shoes and branded watches. Well, not anymore.

My current state of mind is… wondering whether or not I am on the path that is meant for me. Yes, I am happy. But fulfillment is something else. I feel I haven’t reached it. At least not yet.

My guiding principle in life is… What you sow is what you reap. Sooner or later, what you did will catch up on you.

I aspire to be…a good person. 

 Is time a friend or a foe?

I used to say time is on my side... That I have a lifetime to accomplish all my goals.

But recently, I have this feeling that time is running out. There are so many things to do. So many dreams to fulfill. So many goals to achieve. And yet SO LITTLE TIME. In the average lifespan of Filipinos at 70, i have already crossed the mid-point.

Must be the mid-life bug again. And i hate this feeling.  Thought I'm over and done with it. Grrrr....

The bug started when a couple of weeks ago, a US-based friend and her husband came for a short break. We were six barkadas way back in college and while in her previous visits (or on occasions when i was the one visiting her in the states), the discussions would be the latest chismis in Manila and other mundane things, I was actually amused that our topics lately have shifted to a new level of sort.

Oh boy, we were talking about children (theirs, not mine), growing families, careers,... and retirement. Yes, retirement! Gosh, i never gave it a serious thought until that fateful dinner.

That's when I realized, "Oo nga ano... I am already into my late 30s. I guess it's high time I should plan my future and prepare for old age..." When I started to think about that, it became clear that i have so many things in my "TO DO" list and wondered whether or not i will be able to achieve all in a lifetime... *sigh*  So many things to do, so little time.

I have to step back a little and may be, one of these days, I will get a clearer perspective and i will be able to chart my directions smoothly.

But as early as now, there are top three "TO DO" in my list which are non-negotiable. These are:

1.) I will retire at age 50 (that's 12 years from now). I cant imagine myself working full time in a company when i reach that age. I want to own my time by then... (If I am still with my present company by that time, eligible na ko to retire coz that will be my 16th year there)

2.) I want to write a book. I also intend to pursue my other passions/ hobbies which had to take a back seat at this time. I want to pursue painting, fashion designing, and teaching even. I won't mind studying again to take related courses.

3.) Travel. A psychic friend told me once that in my previous life, I was a gypsy. Well, Gypsy or not, I want to travel the world. If only money is not a problem, I would love to revisit again the 40 or so countries (and really explore these places) that I was fortunate to visit while i was in my 20s.

Only time can tell if I will be able to do all these. It is my hope that in the end, time will prove to be a friend...

 It's just the ego.

I guess, all of us have experienced a bruised ego. The normal thing to do is to accept it, honor the feeling of the moment, lick your wound, and move on to eventual healing. What will make the difference, however, is how fast can you can move on and make your life as normal as it used to be.

In spirituality classes, the first thing that a guru teaches his students is at least taming (if not totally mastering) the ego. There are techniques and guides but when you find yourself in THE situation, all that you have learned (which you thought you have mastered) seemed to have gone away.

I am still in the process of mastering the ego (and mastering myself. It's a constant challenge *sigh*). Hopefully, i will learn the lesson fast. I may not perfect it, but it's also my hope that after each experience, there will emerge a better ME.

Perhaps, it must be the reason why the universe recently let me experience again the feeling of having a bruised ego to see how i fared this time. The result remains to be seen. If there is one positive development this time, I am now aware of what is happening...

I draw inspiration from the writings of, who else but Paulo Coelho. His book The Warrior of the Light has been a helpful companion in my life's journey.

"The Warrior of the Light knows the value of persistence and of courage. Often, during combat, he receives blows that he was not expecting. And he realizes that, during war, his enemy is bound to win some of the battles. When this happens, he weeps bitter tears and rests in order to recover his energy a little. But he immediately resumes his battle for his dreams.

The longer her remains away, the more likely he is to feel weak, fearful, and intimidated. When a horseman falls off his horse, if he does not remount immediately, he will never have the courage to do so again."  (Warrior of the Light: A Manual by Paulo Coelho, page 99)

Do you believe in Soulmate? Are you part of the ultra-romantics or have you become cynical about this?

Another question: do you belong to the 94 percent who said that the first requirement in a spouse is being a soulmate?

Are you also part of the 87 percent who think they will find the person when they are ready?

(Source: Gallup poll sponsored by the National Marriage Project, Rutgers University. Poll of 1,003 ages 20 - 29 has a margin of error of + or - 4 percentage points. This was first posted at http://www.flatrock.org.nz)

I am half-way through reading Paulo Coelho's Brida. (As i have written in a previous blog, He makes me think while reading his novels. I may not totally agree with the views echoed by his characters but heck, his books make me think and analyze. That's why I love him! )

While having my afternoon reading, I reached the page where one of the characters, Wicca, explaining to Brida what Soulmate is all about... (Pls note that the book is non-fiction. it is based on the life of Brida as she strives to learn the ways of Wiccan witches)

She said: "The whole of man's life on the face of the earth can be summed up by that search for his Soulmate. He may pretend to be running after wisdom, money, or power, but none of that matters. Whatever he achieves will be incomplete if he fails to find his Soulmate.

"With the exception of a few creatures who are descended from the angels-- and who need solitude in order to encounter God-- the rest of humanity will only achieve union with God if, at some point, at some moment in their life, they manage to commune with their Soulmate." (page 57)

Heavy stuff huh? Here's my take: I used to believe in Soulmate. I guess, that's the romantic side of me who believes in a fairy-tale happy-ever-after endings for everyone. May be the concept of Soulmate is true, after all... for the rest of those who think they have found theirs.

Me? I would like to align myself with those "few creatures who descended from the angels"... lol...

What's your take?

And I am soooooo happy i discovered this book yesterday at Powerbooks!

I've read all his books (except of course those that have not yet been translated to English) and i've been wishing for years that Brida, one of his earlier novels in Portuguese, will have an English version.

(Apart from his books, I also have his biography "Confessions of a Pilgrim" by Spanish journalist Juan Arias)

At last, 18 years later (the novel was written in 1990), an english edition was released and has been made available in Powerbooks! Just had to grab one :) This is a perfect read for the long break...

Will rate it as soon as i'm done! I just hope that this book is worth the wait... Gotta start reading now :-)

****
Synopsis:

The spellbinding new novel from one of the world's best-loved authors, Paulo Coelho, recounting the story of Brida, and her pursuit of wisdom. This is the story of Brida, a young Irish girl, and her quest for knowledge.

She has long been interested in various aspects of magic, but is searching for something more. Her search leads her to people of great wisdom, who begin to teach her about the world. Her teachers sense that Brida has a gift, but cannot tell what that is.

Meanwhile, Brida pursues her course ever deeper into the mysteries of life, seeking to answer questions about who she is. She meets a wise man who dwells in a forest, and teaches her about overcoming her fears and trusting in the goodness of the world, and a woman who teaches her how to dance to the music of the world, and how to pray to the moon.

She seeks her destiny, as she struggles to find a balance between her relationships and her desire to become a witch. This enthralling novel incorporates themes fans of Paulo will love. It is a tale of love, passion, mystery and spirituality.
 
(from Amazon.com)

I went to bed with a heavy feeling that night. Still can't sleep, i grabbed the book "Thoughts from the Seat of the Soul" by Gary Zukav (It's a permanent fixture on my bedside table, together with the Bible and "With God All things are Possible: A Handbook of Life").

Randomly, i opened a page and i was shocked with what I read. It was as if a direct message from God himself. It goes: "Take your hands off the steering wheel. Be able to say to the Universe, Thy Will Be Done, and to know it within your intentions."

Natulala ako...

I actually made a comment on her site. I am publishing it here with additional thoughts (kasi medyo mahaba na yun comment ko sa site nya hehe)

hmmm... come to think of it? do i have a bestfriend? ang alam ko meron akong "inner circle" na mga kaibigan... and im sure of their loyalty... they will die for me.

pero yun 1 bestfriend? i dont know... does this mean yun lagi mong nakakasama madalas? yung pinakamatagal mo na kakilala? someone who knows you inside out?

nag-isip tuloy ako... parang walang natatangi. kasi lahat sila pare-pareho. they all know my life, my deepst fears, my greatest hopes, my likes and dislikes. wala ako itinago at maitatago sa kanila... if these are the basis, then i guess, i consider them all my bestfriends.

sa paglipas ng panahon, ive been betrayed, hurt, and loved. kasama ko sila sa lungkot at pati na sa tagumpay. They cried with me. They laughed with me. My joys are their joys. My sorrows they have also embraced.

Kumbaga, they are all extra special to me. Walang angat. Lahat, pantay-pantay. Some of them i met in college, and some etong mga later years na. Though the length of years vary, the depth of our samahan is the same.

Nakakatawa pa, iba-ibang grupo ang mga eto. Me iba-ibang interes, nasa iba-ibang larangan. Minsan, one group does not like the other group. Wala lang chemistry, ganun. But they have a common denominator: that's ME.

I love them all for they respect my choices. Di nila ako pinapapili kung sino ang mas mahal ko. Pag may misunderstandings even to a set of my friends, nakakatuwa kasi sa akin din sila tumatakbo o nagsusumbong. Naku, kung intregera lang ako, mas lalo silang nag-away away hahaha!

That's why I love them all the more. They know i don't take sides. Basically, I am there for them to listen, and bridge...

My experience with people (coz ive been too trusting and gullible) made me choosy when it comes to friends. Mabibilang mo lang talaga sa daliri ang mga kaibigang nasa "inner circle" ko.

Who i have now are my bestfriends. They are God's gifts. I just hope that the friendship i have with them will be for life...

"There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven... He has made everything appropriate in its time. (Ecclesiastes 3: 1; 12)"

It's just a matter of time. Sooner or later, it will happen. I just hope that when it finally happens, I am prepared for it. 

Change is inevitable. As the saying goes: the only permanent thing in this world is change.

Am I ready for change? Why am i getting uncomfortable with the mere thought of it? There's no way but to embrace it fully lest the world will pass me by and i don't want to be left behind...

To borrow a line from Keane: "Everybody's changing... and i don't feel the same..."

Courage, Warrior!!!